20 Jul 2018

The Works Limerick Competition: String Instruments

From The Works, 10:04 am on 20 July 2018

Nick Tipping, host of The Works on RNZ Concert, poses a weekly musical topic to inspire the creation of new limericks by our clever and humorous audience members. Each Friday we choose the best of the week.

There are creative rhymes for zither, viola, and harp in this week's competition, which focuses on stringed instruments.

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Photo: supplied

This week's winner:

It looks easy to play on the harp
but harpists - politely - will carp
that it's tuned in C-flat
(Now just fancy that!)
with seven pedals, for nat'ral and sharp. 

Hugh Young

Click here for more limericks

Highly commended:

Though her eyebrows would signal "Come hither"
As my darling one played on the zither,
When she played "Harry Lime"
for the ninety-ninth time
I no longer could stand to be with 'er.

Hugh Young


Guitarists in general adore,
Playing Brower, Granados and Sor.
They like tinkling and plinking,|
But if they start drinking,
They might be Segovia floor.

Paula Weir


A misguided young lady named Pat
Always fiddled too sharp or too flat
And the screech of her bow
On the strings seemed as though
All the catgut was still on the cat.

Rosalie Sneyd


In Guinea to play the viola
Tod contracted a case of ebola
He recovered you ask
And took the docs to task
It was just pseudovariola

Ann Ryan


There once was an arrogant fellow
Who fancied himself on the cello
But the sound was so bad
It drove neighbours mad
'Shut up' they would constantly bellow

Ray Gilbert


And an effort from Nick Tipping, host of The Works:

Each morning the fair Steven Isserlis
Emergeth anew from his chrysalis
When he stretcheth his wings,
'stead of bow touching strings
Our friend Mr Isserlis whistleth.