By investigative reporter Amy Greenbank
Sophie Tilley's son was mistakenly handed over to the grandfather of another child by Bangor First Steps Learning Academy. Photo: ABC News / Jak Rowland
A Sydney mother whose son was mistakenly picked up by the grandfather of another infant at the childcare centre says the incident has left her unable to trust that daycare centres will protect her children.
Bangor mum Sophie Tilley has spoken publicly for the first time as an investigation by the regulator into the error, which she said has had a profound impact on her family, stretched into its ninth week.
Her one-year-old son was returned unharmed after the man realised his mistake.
The 35-year-old is choosing to share her story with the ABC as the sector comes under renewed scrutiny.
The incident took place at First Steps in Bangor on September 1. Photo: ABC News / Liam Patrick
Data obtained by Four Corners under freedom of information shows the New South Wales childcare regulator has not acted following hundreds of investigations into serious incidents involving children in daycare.
On 1 September, Tilley and her partner arrived at First Steps in Bangor just after 5pm to find her one-year-old was missing.
Her three-year-old boy ran to greet them, but the educator told her an "older man in shorts" had already collected her younger son.
"I can't describe it. It was this utter pit in my stomach," she said.
"I just went into panic. I couldn't really talk, function, I was a mess."
Tilley tried to "hold it together" for her older son, who by now was upset and running around the centre shouting: "My brother is missing, where is my brother?"
She told him he was just playing a long game of hide-and-seek.
Tilley says she could not move after being told her son was missing. Photo: ABC News / Jak Rowland
Son missing for hours
The Bangor centre called police and reviewed CCTV footage, discovering the infant had been accidentally taken home by the grandfather of another child at the centre at 3.30pm.
The elderly man did not realise the mix-up.
She was told her boy had quietly "sat on his lap for two hours watching TV" before being returned to the centre when the man was notified.
He later sent flowers to her family to apologise.
Tilley said she "grabbed [her son] out of the back seat, he clung on to me … he just gripped on".
"That night I didn't want to put either of them down, I held them so tightly. We just sat on the sofa and cuddled - the whole four of us."
The man involved in the mix-up apologised to the family and sent flowers. Photo: ABC News / Jak Rowland
Tilley said she did not blame the grandfather and believed it was a failure of basic "policies and procedures" at the centre.
She said the man was not required to sign in or identify himself before being handed her boy and his school bag, and walking out of the centre without signing the child out.
A spokesperson for First Steps Learning Academy said the site has since overhauled its procedures and "implemented a two-step sign-out process".
Lasting impact
For a fortnight after the incident, Tilley was unable to sleep.
"I was going over what could have happened and every worst-case scenario," she said.
Tilley said she has tried hard to stay strong for her two boys but has struggled.
"I'm in therapy, I'm on tablets to help with anxiety and stress levels … without them I think I'd be a mess.
"I have big trust issues now, if I can't see the boys in the garden, if they run down the aisle in the shopping centre, I get very concerned."
Tilley says the incident has left her in therapy for anxiety and stress. Photo: ABC News / Jak Rowland
Her older son, who witnessed the police arrive at the centre before the boy was located, was also deeply affected. Police said at the time that no offences were detected and there would be no criminal investigation.
Tilley said he gets upset every time he hears a siren, so she bought a toy police car to try and help him create "positive associations" and happier memories.
Department's investigation drags on
It has been over two months since the incident, and the Department of Education is yet to finalise its investigation.
Tilley has been calling the regulator weekly for updates.
"Why is the case still open? Why has the centre not been held accountable? It makes me sick to my stomach," she said.
"We pay an absolute fortune to go to daycare and stuff like this happens. We trust people with the most important things in our lives".
A spokesperson for First Steps Learning Academy said it takes its "responsibilities extremely seriously and proactively manages its sites and staff so we can consistently meet our own expectations of excellence - not just the conditions set by the regulator".
Breaches at other First Steps Centres
First Steps Learning Academy has 10 early learning and preschool sites in Sydney.
The ABC revealed in September that the regulator was also investigating another incident at its Kirrawee centre in which a child went into anaphylaxis during breakfast.
Documents made public through a Standing Order 52 (SO52), and accessed by the ABC's Four Corners, reveal further breaches at different First Steps Learning Academy centres.
The documents show the NSW Department of Education's regulatory team has taken disciplinary action against First Steps centres and educators 20 times since 2022, including at Bangor, Kirrawee, Liverpool, Marrickville, Moorebank and former sites Toongabbie and Old Toongabbie.
Documents show the regulator has previously taken disciplinary action against First Steps centres and educators. Photo: ABC News / Jak Rowland
At Tilley's Bangor centre, an investigator issued the provider with a compliance breach notice in October 2024 after discovering 41 children on-site, when the centre was only approved for 40.
The field officer also noted there were no accredited early childhood teachers on staff despite two being required, and only one working toilet for 21 preschoolers.
In August last year, a First Steps Bangor educator was found to have used "unreasonable discipline" on a child, after they allegedly pulled them by the leg to force them to lie on the bed and then covered the infant's face with a sheet.
The documents reveal a range of other warnings and compliance breaches, but two of the more serious incidents occurred at First Steps Toongabbie, which was sold in October to another provider.
In 2024, one educator admitted to unreasonably disciplining a child when they pulled them up by their arms to a standing position before dragging them to the nappy change door by one wrist.
In 2023, a casual staff member was found to have picked up a child "in a rough and aggressive manner" and forced them into a chair, bruising their hip on the armrest.
Documents show a range of warnings, compliance breaches and cautions issued to First Steps Learning Academy centres. Photo: ABC News / Jak Rowland
The childcare worker then lied about what caused the injury to a colleague, until being confronted with the CCTV vision the following day and admitting to it.
Both educators were required to enter an undertaking - legally enforceable agreements - with the regulator, pledging that they "will not physically discipline a child in an inappropriate manner, including by using physical force to redirect a child".
Both were dismissed from the Toongabbie site following the incidents.
A spokesperson for First Steps Learning Academy said it has recently strengthened its management and centre support, bolstered its professional development and has "a comprehensive review of on-site safety".
"The provider's licence for First Steps Learning Academy has never been threatened or cancelled. Two known matters remain under investigation with the regulator," they said.
"All other matters have been satisfactorily resolved … [and] any further actions will be promptly implemented in full."
- ABC
