Many CEOs across the globe are psychopaths well-adjusted to the capitalist system, focused on profit and lacking empathy for ordinary people, says clinical psychologist Dr Ramani Durvasula.
Durvasula, who built a career out of demystifying and dismantling the toxic influence of narcissism, told Jesse Mulligan heads of business were well served by their traits of psychopathy as it gave them an edge operating within the free market.
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The best-selling author says narcissism also plays a role, as these two cluster-B personality disorders share traits, but clinically remain two distinct conditions.
“The lack of empathy, the entitlement, the grandiosity, the charm, the charisma – that’s what’s similar," she says.
"The big difference is the narcissist is very insecure, they feel quite inadequate. Not so with the psychopaths, who are very cool, very callous – in fact, they’re very anxiety and stress-resistant and they don’t feel any remorse.
“[There are ]Narcissistic people who feel remorse, but it will come out of shame. But psychotic people – they’ll kill someone and go and have lunch, that’s not a problem for them.”
Not all psychopaths are killers, but she says the trauma they can leave people with by their wilful behaviour can be extreme.
“If someone completely cleaned out someone’s business, destroyed them financially and their family financially, that in its own way is its own form of grief and death, because a person can’t come back from that.
“It’s the unique ability of a psychopath to completely dismantle another human being’s life and feel nothing bad about doing that.”
She says it is no surprise that research has found psychopaths are heavily involved in the economy, as star-performing captains of industry, investment and finance.
“There’s been some really interesting research on that. Basically, they look at traits and behaviours that the CEO may evidence," she says.
“Some studies are shown rates of 20-to-25 percent in CEOs of having these psychopathic patterns and it makes sense when you think about it.
“That coolness under pressure that actually works well for a CEO, but it’s also that harshness of laying off 10,000 people, or taking away their jobs a week before Christmas, they have no problem doing that either, because they really are in a very calculated way, able to stay only focused on the bottom line with little regard for other people as human beings.”
Modern society rewards both narcissists and psychopaths for their behaviour in broader terms too, she says.
“There’s a lot of good research that shows narcissistic folks make more money and that’s an effect more pronounced among men. So, the qualities that comprise narcissism and also psychopathy work in a capitalistic society.
"The lack of empathy means a person is a lot more nimble, and willing to make difficult decisions and tends to be very Machiavellian and step on other people to get ahead, to do what they need to do to close the sale, to abuse who they need to abuse to get to advance their own careers.
“That extends to other things, as there’s a lot of research showing that the narcissist gets the girl, the narcissist gets the partner and they have much more success in mating behaviour.
"They’re much more likely to get people to enter into partnerships with them and more people who actually want to marry them. Even though they’re absolutely terrible marital partners.”
One trait that they instrumentalise very well is self-confidence and charm, drawing people in so they can be manipulated and used to benefit their objectives.
“With psychopathy in particular there’s a real shallow charisma – it’s very shallow, very instrumental to get them what they want and then the charisma’s gone," she says.
"In both groups there’s real charismatic flair, especially with the grandiose narcissist, who really is the attention-seeking, extroverted, charmer and that’s why people are drawn to them.”
There are other signs to look for, and some are visceral responses from the body.
She says, from her clinical experience, it is evident many people are alerted to the presence of a malignant narcissist or psychopath from the gut, a feeling of unease.
“They’ll say I feel the little hair in the back of my neck standing up and feel incredibly uncomfortable,” she says.
Many pass the sensation off as nerves but then regret not paying more attention to the feeling when they discover what that person is like later.
Another sign of a narcissist is their inability, or lack of desire, to listen to a person, although they may initially be attentive as a means of drawing that person in.
Another tell-tale sale is extreme defensiveness and sensitivity to perceived criticism.
“They’re very, very, very sensitive to any form of feedback or criticism and that’s a sign that shows up earlier, far more with the narcissistic people, than the psychopaths, because the psychopaths are that thin-skinned.”
With psychopaths, there was be inconsistencies in what they’ve said and a general unease that something doesn’t feel right.
“They really do have these parasitic lifestyles that are characterised by lying and they often have pretty spotty employment histories," Durvasula says.
"So, if you try to get a history out of them – real relationships, past jobs, they’ll either try to deflect it and not answer, or they’ll give you these stories that don’t always seem to add up.”
Narcissism is also seen in the charity sector and religious settings, she says.
'Communal narcissists' get their narcissistic supply and validation from being seen to be virtuous and upstanding members of the community. Psychopaths also get involved in this area to exploit people and make money. But the mask slips fully behind closed doors, with family and partners seeing the true nature of that individual’s mode of being in the world.
“It’s a more manipulative play because now people think you’re such a nice person and maybe more willing to let their guard down,” she says.
Durvasula’s book Should I Stay or Should I Go, How to Survive a Relationship with a Narcissist looks at the forms of abuse from this type of boundary-breaking partner.
Many times, she says, people feel like can’t leave, for cultural reasons, out of fear, lack of money, the involvement of children and out of love.
For those who remain she preaches 'radical acceptance' – the recognition that their narcissist partner isn’t going to change and that they must see through their gaslighting and crazy-making behaviours to protect themselves.
“When you can teach people that, people can cultivate other sources of support outside of the relationship, they find other sources of meaning and purpose. But they stop acting like the moths to flames, constantly getting themselves singed by the fires of the narcissistic relationship. I would estimate that half of people stay.”
