Humans are living longer than ever before but we've lost the leadership and wisdom of elders, says Canadian author and activist Stephen Jenkinson.
Becoming an elder is a skill we can teach by example, he writes in the book Come of Age: A Case for Elderhood in a Time of Trouble.
Canadian author and activist Stephen Jenkinson Photo: Supplied
'Elderhood' only comes as a consequence of people "obeying the limits of life", Jenkinson says, which includes accepting aging and death.
"You [now] have 55-year-olds in competition with 25-year-olds for virtually all of the same things – including enlightenment, as well as their next boyfriend or girlfriend. When you have a circumstance like that, the young people have no respect for older people."
In a "working" culture, everyone alive would be an 'elder in training' whose character developed not unlike like a fine wine, he says.
"When [wine] is good there's something deep and deepening about it … Over the course of its alchemy, it deepens and it diminishes at the same time ... It deepens in consequence but it's diminished in volume."
At 64, Jenkinson says his love of life is deepened by the awareness that it won't last forever.
"[Desire to live and acceptance of death] are kind of unlikely twins towards the end of your life. And if you make room for both of them and younger people are watching you do it, you become some kind of inadvertent example of what a whole human being looks like – not a victorious human, a whole human. That gives them one shining, living example that's not a rumour or a suggestion. It's actually there in the world to be considered."
Gratitude is the best antidote Jenkinson knows for depression and despair that can come with facing death.
"If we're lucky enough to wise up… younger people are watching us wise up. They're stirred by that example. Not that they want to emulate it right away because it's in the nature of youth to ignore a lot of things, but … you start to recognise that people older than you seem to be alert to more things than you gave them credit for … Our capacity to be grateful is deeper than our capacity to feel masterful."
You can watch Griefwalker – a 2008 documentary about Stephen Jenkinson and his philosophy on the National Film Board of Canada website.
